Provide feedback that helps students risk, fail, rise.
Hi Olivia, for your What We Keep Challenge, you identified your necklace, which holds your father's ashes, as something meaningful that you keep. Your narratives for your video explains when you were given the necklace as well as why it is significant to you. You added animations to your words as well as provided a nice display to show your project.
You identified how your love for your father was deep which is why you felt a special connection to your necklace. In reflecting upon where you could continue to develop this more, sharing a concrete story about a memory that you have with your father. You can try to explain more details of what and how you felt the day that you and your father went out for ice cream. These kinds of details can help others connect more and see why your necklace is so significant to you. You can even explain more about the day that you got the necklace from your stepmom and how it made you feel. These are my suggestions but you don’t have to make these changes unless you feel the need to do so. However, I will recommend you think about the more details that you can add to your writing. As far as your reflection answers go, I think you did well with answering exactly what you were asked. Though, next time I suggest trying to answer the questions in full sentences by restating the question first.
Can you make these few changes in the upcoming weeks? Whenever you have a chance to go back to make revisions let me know so I can look at your work again.
Thanks
-Ms.Bibbie
Provide feedback that helps students risk, fail, rise.
Hi Parker, for your What We Keep Challenge, you identified your first arrow that you shot with your bow as something meaningful that you keep and discovered that Davey treasures his fisherman statue that he got from his dad. Your narratives of both posters explains who gave you both your objects and why they were given to you. You provide pictures of both objects and give a descriptive, concrete memory of the day you received your bow.
You identified how keeping your bow helps you to get the feeling of achievement, same how you felt when you first used the bow. In reflecting upon where you could continue to develop this more, sharing more details about a time when you used your bow as a motivation to achieve something. These kinds of details can help others connect more and see how you keep your bow to help feel a sense of achievement. These are my suggestions but you don’t have to make these changes unless you feel the need to do so. However, I will recommend you think about the more details that you can add to your writing. As far as your reflection answers go, I think you did well with answering exactly what you were asked. Though, next time I suggest re-reading your writing to fix any vocabulary mistakes
Can you make these few changes in the upcoming weeks? Whenever you have a chance to go back to make revisions let me know so I can look at your work again.
Thanks
-Ms.Bibbie